Orgies as a form of exposure therapy.

Vanilla’s First Sex Party…

I received a text from a random prior Tinder date inviting me to a sex party in La Jolla. Filled with confusion and slight insult I inquired why he would reach out to me for such a venture when I never heard from him thereafter. He was vulnerable in expressing that he had never been to a sex party before and would be comfortable with being accompanied by someone familiar in this realm. He then went on to state that he had issues around performance anxiety and followed through with my suggestion to attending a party as a means to alleviate fears and thoughts around sex, while being exposed to an environment that is far beyond control. Upon arrival, I was able to coach him through some breathing techniques in the car and casually dived into his intrusive thoughts over drinks while replacing them with the reality that was taking shape around him. Which at the time happened to include some eye fucks from a couple and a few single attendees as well. I then psychoeducated him on proper play party etiquette with a heavy emphasis on consent and respecting people’s boundaries. Before I knew it, he was able to strike up some casual conversations and I was able to slip out with the confidence of knowing that he was in store for a long and eventful night. The next morning, I received a detailed text of all of the pleasures that were fulfilled along with the lasting effects of feeling more confident with initiating and performing one on one with partners as well. This is no different from the flooding technique used in therapy to treat phobias. If you have a fear or anxiety of something, sometimes it may be beneficial to expose and surrender to the fear completely. With the right coaching and support of course;)